We were warned that it would all end
I have a job that every day I watch people arguing about God. How ardently they prove something, convince, quarrel, insult, divide into teams and groups. I also once did this – for hours, days, weeks, arguing with people about how to live correctly, trust correctly, pray correctly.
Surprisingly exciting experience. Soul-harming, of course, but not coming off.
True, I no longer believe any of the disputants. I do not believe in the motives that they give out for their own.
I don’t believe in striving to convince my neighbor: I'm sorry, you have to be a complete idiot not to notice that disputes are fruitless and never convince anyone of anything. But you, friends, are not idiots?
Also, I don’t believe in sincere concern for readers who, with their wise arguments, want to protect them from deadly delusions, because outside of an energetic blabble on high topics, the disputants, as a rule, do not show such anxiety for the brothers. Such selective concern is neurosis, not love. Like an inflated dad who gives a child painful cuffs to make him eat porridge.
But if this is not for opponents, and not for readers, then this is for yourself.
By the way, there is nothing so bad about this. I now also write for myself.
A normal dispute is based on the fact that, being in the same conceptual field, using the same methods, the opponents try to demonstrate the inconsistency of various postulates. This happens, for example, in a scientific discussion.
In the case of Internet demagogy about faith, everything happens differently: opponents do not read so much and try to understand each other as fix their own points of view and begin to massively confirm their truth, using the words of the other, except as a driving belt to find the right quotes.
And kontrtsitat. And kontkontrtsitat. And so many times.
Quotation is the main tool in the argument about God. From the Scriptures, from the Holy Fathers, from the Social Concept, from the beloved old man – no matter where. In fact, people talk to themselves with other people's words. Durable and unchanged. Which do not need a substantiation and are not subject to doubt, for their author is holy. Time after time, repeating for an authoritative source, a person confirms to himself that he is right, as if he is substituting new and new supports for a falling home.
Because the house that does not fall, does not need props. Hot sincere faith does not stand on quotations and does not repeat them right and left – it embodies them with life and creates new things. If you have nothing to say about your faith, except to quote someone there, is that your faith? This is just someone else's quote. Its author was probably a great man – but you are not him. And you will not become them from the repetition game.
And I experienced it myself, in fact, how dangerous this game is. All these quotations and quotations of meaning end when the Lord truly experiences.
One day, the day comes when questions are asked not by the beloved forum, but by life. And the quote from the correct book does not cheer the heart and does not invigorate the soul when the planet stops from grief. Against the background of a gigantic, insoluble problem “what should I do with myself and this impending death,” all words become unimportant and uninteresting.
And even the stories about the heroes of the past and the wonders of someone else's life path do not help. Both brilliant logical constructions, and games of Orthodox theological beads – all this does not warm in the icy space without a single living soul.
Because we were warned that it would all end.
And the texts, beliefs, and dogmas, and miracles, and all that jazz will pass away. There will be love, which is difficult to determine, but clearly recognizable. The gospel is not for nothing divided into four, written in parables and provides an infinite field for playing opposing quotations – good, for two thousand years they have been engaged in this.
This is such a fat Lord of the Lord – guys, you do not need to dig here. If it were a matter of convictions, precise wording and repetition of the right words, the Lord would not guess our riddles, but would leave a short list of unambiguous ideas and that would be so limited. In general, he always goes along the simplest and easiest path – “he said and it became so”; He has no need for extra frills.
God does not work in show business and is not listed as a senior clerk, valued for literaryism. God is Love, and Christ brought life in abundance, not phrases.
Christ will live in us – no quotes will be needed. And you will continue quoting – well, everyone was warned.
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